Tough Decissions

To work or not to work, that is the question. It is a tough call and a conscientious decision that is made by husband and wife. There are many reasons why a mother will go back to work or not to go back to work. It is even harder when outsiders judge the mother without knowing the full scenario.

Now I am a working mom who works outside the home as well as inside the home at night. I get to do both and work very hard. I splurged this year and have a babysitter to come to my house instead of sending my baby to someone else. I felt that he would benefit the one on one attention, and being in his own environment instead of with many other kids of different ages. He is my first baby that I was not home for at this age. I feel guilty already without having others tell me about their point of view on this subject matter. It is my choice and reasoning and no one else can really understand it. I am happy that at least I am able to have the babysitter in my house, as opposed to sending the baby out all day.

There are many benefits of having someone in your house. Right now is a great time to have a babysitter in the house, opposed to sending them out. All my kids are off from school now, so I am not paying extra to have someone else watch all of them. They have about a week off from school and she is there to entertain them and take them out to the park. She arranged play dates after I left her with a few phone numbers and when the kids received a call, she took care of it. This alone is a relief off of my back. Last year I moved into to my mom’s house, and on erev Pesach, I left her with two kids. Trust me, I have received numerous comments on how wrong it was for me to do what I did. But reality is my mom didn’t say no, and then made me run tons of errands for her when I did get back from work without my kids. So it was not as bad as you think. Had she said no, I wouldn’t have gone to work. Now I have someone here to watch them while I go to work.

I keep losing my train of thought while I stop writing this and work.

Next week is chol hamoed. I am not sure yet what I am going to do. I told my boss I was taking off two days and she was fine with whatever I chose. I said I feel bad leaving the kids on chol hamoed. I am not so sure now what I am going to do about it. I am still thinking if I will take an extra day off and stay with them. It is not like they will be alone. They will do things with my family, but I can still have that Jewish mother guilt. Maybe I will hook up with a friend or two. Maybe I can see if I can bring work home and do work at night so it won’t be the worst thing to take off so many days. I also need to factor in Succos and what I am going to do then.

Gotta run, good gossip going on here and I want to listen to what is going on. Maybe it will be a new topic for me, Jewish children vs. non-Jewish children.

Happy cleaning!

Yesterday

We were invited to an impromptu barbeque. Not so far from us and we always wanted to check it out. So we went.

Before we went we had our very own picnic in our back yard. You see my darling three year old has been asking for a picnic for over a week already. Ever since we read about how Winnie the Pooh goes on a picnic, he very sweetly asked if we could have one. I told him when the weather gets warmer, sure why not. It would be fun! So every day he kept asking for it. I told him on a Sunday so his Abba can join as well. He couldn’t wait. So yesterday he asked for it since he looked outside and saw that it was sunny. Sure enough we had a picnic for lunch.

I made sandwiches for the kids and gave them a juice box. I heated up leftovers for my husband and myself. We found something to use as a tablecloth and off we went, to eat our lunch outside. It was fun. It was in our own backyard. The little guy was glowing. He was very happy. He had a great idea and we followed through with it. We all had fun. Even the baby who was eating the bigger kids lunches!

After our picnic lunch, we packed up the car and off we went to our barbeque. It wasn’t far, but if we planned it right, the kids would get a good nap and wont be cranky. It worked. We got there two hours later. We were the only ones there. A single guy said he might show up, but didn’t. Our friend tried to get a hold of another couple but they weren’t reachable. Not by land line and not by cell p hone. I said she is in labor then. I am very close with her, and knew she was really due any day. I tried calling them at home but got the machine. Through out the meal, I kept calling my voice mail to see if they left a message, as at this point I was waiting to hear about the babies. Sure enough we get a phone call there. It’s a girl and a boy! Mazel Tov!

I am so happy for her. A little girl. A little boy. So very nice, to a wonderful couple. I am still getting over the shock that my friend is a father! He is a father, scary thought!!! Watch out world! Watch out kids! Oh, he is still on cloud nine, I don’t know when he will land, but he is so very happy! It is contagious. I on a high from talking to him. I am so very happy and excited and cannot wait to see the little ones. What wonderful news. Oif simchas to all!

What to Write About...

I give up. I can’t do this anymore. I have written about three drafts to write, but couldn’t finish them. I couldn’t get them into a blog format. My mind is just not into the writing feature this week. Maybe when things calm down I will be able to write coherent words of wisdom and my dedicated readers will actually have something to read this upcoming week. Who knows?

Will I write about how hard it is to live out of a suitcase for the entire yomtov? Will I complain about being at family for the entire time and have no space? And how this and that is different. And and and and. I will try to take note from my friend and talk about positive things. I will definitely try to enjoy myself while I am there. I can’t complain if I don’t do anything, so I will do things to make it enjoyable for everyone there. I will take suggestions from any and everyone who has suggestions to offer!

Packing is annoying as well. Who knows what the weather will be like and I am always bound to leave something important at home. I will make sure to take enough clothing with and my laptop! Never leave home without it. I never tried to see if it will work with the wireless, but I am hoping it will.

I decided that for the family we are to take off two days each for chol hamoed. Of the two days each, one will coincide with each other so we can have a family day out. I am not sure when and what we will do, but I hope it will be fun. The other two days we are on our own and the fourth day, the kids will be with my mom without us. I can’t take off so many days from work, so this is a good compromise. I hope the kids have fun as well.

When did the phenomenon of doing something every single day of chol hamoed the norm? When I was younger, we didn’t go out to all the attractions on every single day. We did other things, but I don’t recall what they were now. I think once we went to the 18th avenue shenanigan. But to do something which all cost a lot of money every day? What is this generation coming to? Can’t they entertain themselves at the park or at home? Can’t we come up with something that doesn’t entail the bells and whistles and something happening every second? I guess I don’t remember my childhood that much, or, I don’t know. But we are going to do something as a family, but not sure what the “bells and whistles” will be.

So, have a chag kasher vsameach. I don’t know when I will be back here to blogger land. I do have to clean and work. But not that much cleaning. Don’t forget the usual joke, check your computer hard drive for chametz!

Until next time…..

Just Stuff

Why didn't anyone tell me that it has been a week since I last blogged? Shame on me! But shame on you my readers for not saying anything.

Fish update: 4 out of 5 are alive and well. I will stop feeding them so much food. Will make sure that the water is clean (actually that is my husbands job, I feed them) The kids, they look at them and the baby laughs and points to them.

Last night we had sheva brachos to go to in Boro Park. I went incognito. I showed up with a hat and a blond shaitel. Yes. I am contemplating of changing my shaitel color and going blond or more blonde and not so dark of a shaitel now. I tried it out. No one commented on it. No one there knew me so well to notice and those who did were not really in the position to say anything (hence the men). So I had no real audience to see what the reaction would have been. I did enjoy wearing the blond color fall, and I am really thinking of changing. I need a bigger audience…or not. I need to figure out the right color for me. I figured, once I get used to it, so will others and it won’t be an issue. It will take time for the adjustment period to get used to the new color, but I am really thinking of it.

My mother took her uncle to the ER yesterday because he wasn’t feeling so well. While she was there an intern went over to her and asked her if she is Mrs. ____ (come on, there are some who don’t me yet). He went on to tell her that he’s good friends with __ her son-in-law (my husband). It was Mikey. He recognized her. My mom called me and when I told her who it was, she remembered the name. It was really cool! I saw him last night at sheva brachos. He told me the story. He said he will go tomorrow and check my great uncle and see how he is doing. Mind you, he just started the ER this month! (BH my uncle seems to be doing better).

On a different note, my baby sitter has been showing up every day for two weeks straight. I am very impressed and very happy with her. The kids really like her and we seemed to have ironed out the things that were issues. I didn’t have time to cook for Shabbos, but she is more than happy to do it so I gave her things to do on this short day (a short working day for her, till 1:30). I would like to finish the rest of the cooking that I need to cook as early as possible so the kids can do things. It is such a long Friday! I don’t know what I am going to do with them. Their bedtime is candle lighting time.

Pesach is around the corner. After this Shabbos one more Shabbos before we move out. Probably moving to my mom for the entire time. Boro Park here I come! I have to brace myself and be ready to be there. (Well, since I don’t go to shul, it is more my husband needs to get ready J hehehe.)

Have a good Shabbos my faithful readers.