We Have Lost Another Precious Soul

So I have this friend who finally called me back. I have lost touch with her over time and I wanted to know how things are going with her. It has been about two years since I have last spoken to her and I wanted to make sure things are good. I somehow got a hold of her email address and actually received a response from her.

Life is ok for her. She is looking into a good school, but as of now can't afford it. She has a job that pays decent, or just enough to screw her. She gets too much for her to get free insurance but not enough to actually pay insurance. Tough luck on that. It is hard to know that you make just over the amount, but not really enough to actually afford things.

She moved out of her old apartment and into a new one with her friend. J. He is not Jewish. She is. But, she threw all that away many many years ago, even before I knew her, though while I knew her, she was just faking it. Living the life she needed to based on where she was living. Once she went on her own, that is it, no more lying, no more hiding no more anything. Moving in with her boyfriend who is 7 years older than her.

I was taken aback when she told me this. Why and how did this happen? Did the school systems lose yet another precious soul? Will she return to us when she gets to be older? Have her advisors not been the best advisors for her and supported her when she wanted out of her highschool, they supported her decision and let her do what she wanted. Had that been a smart move? Or would she have survived where she was for the remaining of highschool and then be the same now...All these questions, and no real answer.

I asked her why she couldn't find a Jewish boyfriend to live with and she said, there aren't any normal ones. If he grew up religious and throwing it away now, he is always guilty and you can't live with one. If they didn't grow up religious, there just no where to be found where she lives. She has had a few "religious" boyfriends who decided they don't want to be religious anymore. They just felt guilty, were losers, and had no plans. This guy she said warns her not to mess with her credit like he did when he was younger. Supports her decisions to go to school. Is basically the best boyfriend she has had and is really good for her. But he is not Jewish.


Me being her older acquaintance, what do I do? Do I just let her live her life without encouraging her to return? Do I tell her that what she is doing is wrong? I know and she knows that no one can tell her what to do. That attitude has been with her for a long time, and she has yet to outgrow it. I don't care for her religious advisors with whom she is still in contact with, I think they lost another one but still think they haven't. I feel for her mom, who cannot do much about it since her mom doesn't live anywhere near here. I feel most for my friend whom is still rebelling and doesn't realize about what she is rebelling against.